Kim Jiyoung, born 1982 ★★★★★
what can i even tell you about this? Nam-Joo portrays modern womanhood perfectly, no notes. internationally applicable and restrained in what it depicts, to me this seems like it was done to give it a wider audience instead of anything stylistic. indeed, it seemed to me that Nam-Joo was not so focused on literary techniques nor beauty nor meaning than facticity- which is reinforced by the statistics and citings throughout. this isn't about lyricality but about being heard as a woman, and i value it deeply for that.

hard boiled wonderland and the end of the world ★★★☆☆
what seems to be the beginning of his distinct style. the dual narrative felt different to and much clearer than his other works, all the mystery left out of it in the end, but this wasn't something i particularly enjoyed. part of what is so special about Murakami for me is something he's often criticsed for- reoccurring motifs, the ability to only write one book, with all his different works just being a shuffling or clipping of this bigger picture. to me it feels like synchronicity and (super)natural beauty, but having this mystery taken away feels as if he's no longer reflecting my interpretations of life, makes the work feel a little further from my heart... wasn't a fan of the ending either, but the build-up was important, for lack of a better word.

child of fortune ★★★★☆
a reread, one that i wasn't so fond of the first time around, and that my feelings are relatively unchanged on. despite this i've given it 4star both times... i can't enjoy reading this book, i feel as if i'm being ragebaited from the sides of both my maternal instincts and my memories of a child's perspective. i went back and forth between 3star and 4star because of this, but i think what tips it upwards is Tsushima's beautiful prose: dream-like descriptions, somewhat surreal, of both regular life and the protagonist's breakdowns, and the ending oh God the ending. i feel that this book's meaning is always just out of reach, that if i could get past my own feelings of injustice i could understand it better, & wonder if this is something that will come with age or experience. despite this, Tsushima strikes deep in my heart and draws out feelings i wasn't even aware of. Child of Fortune is uncomfortably evocative and seeped in meaning, just beyond the veil.

minor detail ★★★★☆
Shibli’s tone is more descriptive than anything else, not of beauty but of facticity. i value this for letting someone so far from the apartheid understand the reality of it a little better, but it doesn't make the book so entertaining. aside from the build-up in tension towards the end of each part, it isn't so entertaining at all, but i feel this was intentional: for me at least, it strengthened the impact of the book and aided the tone i felt Shibli was aiming for. i feel that it would be superficial to ask this book for entertainment, that if people aren't entertained in a genocide why should we be? this matter-of-factness is also what makes the book sort of haunting, reflecting the indifference so many people feel when overwhelmed with tragedy. but it's these minor details and reoccurring motifs that transform something from that “which can only be described as tragic” into that which is deeply personal and evocative.

the woman in the dunes ★★☆☆☆
a regular Joe Sand-lover spouts pretentious sexist drivel for ~240 pages. i just couldn't feel any sympathy for the protagonist, maybe this is how Abe intended to acheive that detached-surrealist atmosphere, but i didn't feel that they were so connected... the flow was a little confusing too (weird sex tangents) but overall Abe paints a good picture of how absurd and futile life (submission & revolt) is. it was suspenseful and interesting, just not to the extent i'd heard it praised for.

what is existentialism ★★★★★
loooved this so much, existentialism straight from the founding mother's mouth. so many quotes stolen for my journal, this felt like it came at the perfect time, bringing many messages i hope to carry into the new year with me. felt radical not just for my interactions with others and the authenticity i let into them, but for my view of myself and my intentions for the future. 'and then what?' is a question i've always been daunted and often been incapacitated by, but de Beauvoir has soothed this... a wealth of knowledge in this book, i'm now free to do with that what i will...

a thousand splendid suns ★★★★★
absolutely broke my heart given today's context. the best male writing of female characters that comes to mind, compassion and understanding and intent. i loved and devoured this, brilliantly written and so emotional and reaching, but more importantly something urgent and with tangible purpose, not just something read but lived. and in all of this horror its still so human, there are still a thousand splendid suns. its difficult to put anything about this into words, Hosseini says everything i could. 'One last time, Mariam did as she was told.'

confessions of a mask ★★★☆☆
even though this book isn't about homosexuality, its portrayal of it did affect my reading... of course, it provides great insight into how homosexuality is pathologised and medicalised, and its depictions are well written. but hearing these associations with gore, depravity, deviance, and perversion over and over again through history and media have meant that i don't find this a particularly meaningful topic. still, Mishima's depictions of inner turmoil, death and obsession are heartfelt, candid if nothing else, and they were what really struck a chord with me.

the unbearable lightness of being ★★★★★
hooooly fuck holy moly. this took me way too long to get through don't even ask why because there's no good answer, since i love love loooved this more than words can describe. refusing to read anything else by Kundera for the forseeable future for fear of ruining this- perfect in isolation. ending was so quiet, out of nowhere, flipped the page several times in confusion. only made it better. affirmed my love for coincidence and the meaning we take from it. last chapter heartwrenching. God i'll never read like that again. God bless Karenin.

the master and margarita ★★★☆☆
(written retroactively, 20 nov)
felt like the deeper meaning of this was a little lost on me. from my perspective, a very fun book, so much so that i only realised near the end how swept up i'd been in the literal. felt that the biblical accounts dragged a little, maybe i wasn't as devoted to them as i should have been, and by the end they only served to confuse me. i'm sure there was beauty in them that i overlooked. great fun with Margarita & the Devil, delight in freedom and possibility. the early twist took me by surprise for sure, i'd expected it to hang over the rest of the book. my reading was tedious but i enjoyed some parts immensely.